do yall have this issue?

[chevy355s10 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close chevy355s10]

ok,heres the deal. i always feel fat,too small,and i never feel like anything is enough as far as size goes.

im a pretty good sized guy. but even if i got to be ronnie colemans size,i probably wouldnt feel satisfied with my size. he'll,they look "normal" to me. dont get me wrong,they are huge. ive just been lookin at their contest pics for so long..i guess all the "AWE" is gone and they look normal to me.

im just wondering why i cant seem to be happy with anything about me or my size,anymore?
ive heard of bigorexia. so,maybe ive got a case of that. who knows,maybe if i had a set of 24"-ers and the body to match,i might be closer to being alright.
but back before i lost my job and all 3 years ago, i had a bit over a 20" arm,and i wasnt happy with it. so,again, i wonder if the "24's" would be good enough?

ive lost 16lbs and 2" off my waist. im down to 245lbs. i can wear a 36" jean and be comfertable. i have an 18-3/4" arm the last time i checked(last week when i weighed myself),and im startin to se the lines on my top 2 abs..........and this isnt enough to me.....wtf?

[Delacruz Member Find all posts View Profile Close Delacruz]

ok,heres the deal. i always feel fat,too small,and i never feel like anything is enough as far as size goes.

im a pretty good sized guy. but even if i got to be ronnie colemans size,i probably wouldnt feel satisfied with my size. he'll,they look "normal" to me. dont get me wrong,they are huge. ive just been lookin at their contest pics for so long..i guess all the "AWE" is gone and they look normal to me.

im just wondering why i cant seem to be happy with anything about me or my size,anymore?
ive heard of bigorexia. so,maybe ive got a case of that. who knows,maybe if i had a set of 24"-ers and the body to match,i might be closer to being alright.
but back before i lost my job and all 3 years ago, i had a bit over a 20" arm,and i wasnt happy with it. so,again, i wonder if the "24's" would be good enough?

ive lost 16lbs and 2" off my waist. im down to 245lbs. i can wear a 36" jean and be comfertable. i have an 18-3/4" arm the last time i checked(last week when i weighed myself),and im startin to se the lines on my top 2 abs..........and this isnt enough to me.....wtf?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_dysmorphic_disorder

Have a read

[chevy355s10 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close chevy355s10]

woah.......you know....what ive been tryin to figure out and understand about myself since i was 7,took you to just read this and pull that up.

[iPenetratah Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close iPenetratah]

Yes. It is called Muscle dysmorphia.

[Cage fighter Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Cage fighter]

I thought it was just a guy thing lol

[MrBig Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close MrBig]

chevy355s10, I read the article at Wikipedia on body dysmorphic disorder, bro are you saying that's you? If so please take care of your self, we'd like to see you hang around here. Ya know what I'm sayin!

[chevy355s10 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close chevy355s10]

:quote: chevy355s10, I read the article at Wikipedia on body dysmorphic disorder, bro are you saying that's you? If so please take care of your self, we'd like to see you hang around here. Ya know what I'm sayin! :quote:

well, to be honest brother,i think so. have had all these symptoms as long as i can remember

Obsessive thoughts about (a) perceived appearance defect(s).(cant stop nit-pickin myself in the mirrior)

Obsessive and compulsive behaviors related to (a) perceived appearance defect(s) (see section below).(cant stop tryin to come up with a new way to "fix" what i saw lackin in the mirrior)

Major depressive disorder symptoms.(chronic depressive disorder. usd to be on an as of meds,but quit taking them at around 15. made me feel weak to have to rely on pills. i can control it pretty well myslf,now days)

Delusional thoughts and beliefs related to (a) perceived appearance defect(s).

Social and family withdrawal, social phobia, loneliness and self-imposed social isolation.(hate being in places like a mall and stuff. i get real nervous and start coming up with reason as to why we "need to leave". gotten better,tho)

Suicidal ideation.(tied to kill myself several times. tried just about everything except a gun.even tried to over-dose on 25,000mg's of tylenol/oxycodone mix. but,havent since the last time didnt work...about 15 or 16. figured if it didnt work "why try again?". plus,i realized how selfish it was to wanna do something like that to everybody in my life.)

Anxiety; possible panic attacks.(diagnosed with this a long time ago-about 10-13)

Chronic low self-esteem.(never thought much of myself and probably never will)

Feeling self-conscious in social environments; thinking that others notice and mock their perceived defect(s).(been diagnosed with chornic social anxiety and i cant stop wondering if peoeple are making comments about me. thats why i used to get so upset when i noticed people looking at me more than a glace. now days,ive worked on it. still gets to me from time to time.)

Strong feelings of shame.(get kept up at night with non-stop thoughts)

Avoidant personality: avoiding leaving the home(kinda)

Decreased academic performance (problems maintaining grades, problems with school/college attendance).(have skipped school to hit the gym more times than i can remember)

Alcohol and/or drug abuse (often an attempt to self-medicate).(had a big problem with drinking and pot. havent smoked pot in about 5 years and didnt drink for 3 years. but i now have the will to control it. so i drink every so offen and not much more than 3 beers)

Repetitive behavior (such as constantly (and heavily) applying make-up; regularly checking appearance in mirrors; see section below for more associated behavior).(cant help to look in a mirror.....and nit-pick and point out all my flaws to myself...)

Seeing slightly varying image of self upon each instance of observing a mirror or reflective surface.(well...yeah)

Perfectionism (undergoing cosmetic surgery and behaviours such as excessive moisturising and exercising with an aim to create an unattainable but ideal body and reduce anxiety).(everybody that i know,say im a perfectionist. i guess it has its usefullness in certin ways. but it does get old)

Note: any kind of body modification may change one's appearance. There are many types of body modification that do not include surgery/cosmetic surgery. Body modification (or related behavior) may seem compulsive, repetitive, or focused on one or more areas or features that the individual perceives to be defective.

im not lookin for pitty. just was answering you. im just startled that i didnt find this kinda stuff out before now.haha
kind of a big weight off my chest. ima stick around man. i got more sense than to "off" myself,now. i got a wife and a life. too much good in my life to waste on some personal issues.

[F.I.S.T. Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close F.I.S.T.]

Great find delacruz.

Hey brother,we as humans all this to a degree,but us in the bodybuilding and fitness game take it to heart more than others sometimes.Any athlete feels this way no matter what sport they are.Always thinking they can be better.Always thinking they can improve.Nothing worng with always looking to learn or improve,but you have to try to keep things in perspective.

Sometimes people also are naturally shy which I have had experience with with one of my sons where it affected him greatly when he was younger.It would completely freeze up and be paranoid that everyone was always loking at him and judging him.It took him a while to get past that and really deal with it with our help of course.He is still shy,but not crippling shy.I always try to do things in public with him to help him face his fear and its worked well.

Try to focus on all the good things about yourself.Everyday tell yourself in your mind the positive things about you.Say these things over and over again and make you believe them.You'll be surprised how this little mind game can do wonders.The mind can do incredible things brother and if you constantly re-inforce these things to yourself ,you'll believe it.

In the military,they teach you many things about mind control and how you can block out many things and make the "unreal" or "untrue" real or true.You have to convince yourself of these things and sooner than later they will be true to YOU.

The family and friends you have obviously think you're something special so whos to say they're wrong?Think of all the good you do for them and that can help stregthen you.

Believe me man,there is always worse out there.

Please try this mind play and keep us posted with your progress.

We all want to see you around here for a long long time.