Tweet
6 wks out from the next show. unless you've competed, it's going to be hard to completely understand the level of focus it takes to follow through with a 16 wks prep. i dont mean this to come off like competitors are somehow special. i feel that if anyone wants it bad enough, they can do the work it takes to get on stage.
its just that the contest prep is a very unique experience.if you haven't done it, i suggest you do. the days and wks and months kinda melt together. they seem to go slow, but often it feels like theres never enough time. anticipation grows and stress builds up through the mind numbing monotony of each day's repetition . . eating...timing meals...having to prep food...it takes so much time alone. plus the cardio...plus the training. plus the posing and the details....oh and plus "real" life, this stuff can get difficult. i'm not complaining here, in case thats the way it sounds...well maybe i am a little haha, but i dont have any anger or resentment for this life. after all, it is the life i choose. And i choose it because it is difficult. if it was easy, i promise you, that you could walk into any gym and casually count at least a dozen hyper muscular guys, peeled to the bone and covered in veins. but thats not the norm, is it? and that cuz this shit is hard. i have found that it allows me to push myself to my absolute limits...to see how much i can take...not how much my body can take. no, thats not the real limit. the real limit is in my head. how much can i emotionally take and keep moving forward. how much discomfort can i suffer, yet still take one more step on the step mill. how many more hours can i toss and turn at night because i'm too hungry to sleep? can i make it until morning? again?
since the last show, 10 days ago, i've been tired. i even got to take a week off the diet and i still felt tired. i had a photo shoot the day after my show, but after that, i even spent a couple days eating whatever i wanted. i ate it all. the burgers, the pizzas. you name it, i ate it. in just a few days, i ballooned up 15 lbs. this wasnt too bad. in the past, i've gained closer to 30 lbs. from this point, i dialed it down a little and started the new diet plan on saturday, 6 wks out from the next show. after the last show, i came off the halo. i had already stopped the clen a wk before that. i reduced my t3 by a small bit and cut the adex down. i've continued on the same injection protocol of test e/mast/tren and plan to keep it that way into the next show. i'll add halo in again. this time, at 3 wks out, instead of 4 wks out like the last show. i'm going to use a higher dose for a shorter time.
so as of today, even after my break, i'm still tired. i cant seem to get enough rest. i've slept through alarm clocks. i've dozed off at work. hell, i've come close to nodding out at traffic lights on more than one occasion. i look around my house and all i see are the things i have been putting off. i see the crumbs from my last meal on the counter. i see a mound of dishes growing in the sink. i constantly am adding to my list of things that need to get done. my girl, who although is very understanding, is rightfully getting tired of the lack of attention. in short, the level of stress from show 1 to show 2, multiplies itself.
i can't live this way for the next 5-6 wks. i am working to get my head around doing what i need to do to put life back in perspective. part of this, is simply just reclaiming my responsibilities as a human being, living here on earth with other human beings. when i was younger, i would have told you that hardcore was living and breathing bodybuilding for every waking moment of life.sacrificing everything. today i'll tell you that hardcore is finding a way to work bodybuilding into your real life and MAKE IT ALL WORK TOGETHER.
its just that the contest prep is a very unique experience.if you haven't done it, i suggest you do. the days and wks and months kinda melt together. they seem to go slow, but often it feels like theres never enough time. anticipation grows and stress builds up through the mind numbing monotony of each day's repetition . . eating...timing meals...having to prep food...it takes so much time alone. plus the cardio...plus the training. plus the posing and the details....oh and plus "real" life, this stuff can get difficult. i'm not complaining here, in case thats the way it sounds...well maybe i am a little haha, but i dont have any anger or resentment for this life. after all, it is the life i choose. And i choose it because it is difficult. if it was easy, i promise you, that you could walk into any gym and casually count at least a dozen hyper muscular guys, peeled to the bone and covered in veins. but thats not the norm, is it? and that cuz this shit is hard. i have found that it allows me to push myself to my absolute limits...to see how much i can take...not how much my body can take. no, thats not the real limit. the real limit is in my head. how much can i emotionally take and keep moving forward. how much discomfort can i suffer, yet still take one more step on the step mill. how many more hours can i toss and turn at night because i'm too hungry to sleep? can i make it until morning? again?
since the last show, 10 days ago, i've been tired. i even got to take a week off the diet and i still felt tired. i had a photo shoot the day after my show, but after that, i even spent a couple days eating whatever i wanted. i ate it all. the burgers, the pizzas. you name it, i ate it. in just a few days, i ballooned up 15 lbs. this wasnt too bad. in the past, i've gained closer to 30 lbs. from this point, i dialed it down a little and started the new diet plan on saturday, 6 wks out from the next show. after the last show, i came off the halo. i had already stopped the clen a wk before that. i reduced my t3 by a small bit and cut the adex down. i've continued on the same injection protocol of test e/mast/tren and plan to keep it that way into the next show. i'll add halo in again. this time, at 3 wks out, instead of 4 wks out like the last show. i'm going to use a higher dose for a shorter time.
so as of today, even after my break, i'm still tired. i cant seem to get enough rest. i've slept through alarm clocks. i've dozed off at work. hell, i've come close to nodding out at traffic lights on more than one occasion. i look around my house and all i see are the things i have been putting off. i see the crumbs from my last meal on the counter. i see a mound of dishes growing in the sink. i constantly am adding to my list of things that need to get done. my girl, who although is very understanding, is rightfully getting tired of the lack of attention. in short, the level of stress from show 1 to show 2, multiplies itself.
i can't live this way for the next 5-6 wks. i am working to get my head around doing what i need to do to put life back in perspective. part of this, is simply just reclaiming my responsibilities as a human being, living here on earth with other human beings. when i was younger, i would have told you that hardcore was living and breathing bodybuilding for every waking moment of life.sacrificing everything. today i'll tell you that hardcore is finding a way to work bodybuilding into your real life and MAKE IT ALL WORK TOGETHER.
Comment